Satire: National Charou Congress Launched

Keep calm and remain amused with this nomination list for a South African Indian Congress! For the real coverage of this local government elections make sure you are tuned in to The Daily Vox who give you the real story uncensored.

‪#‎LocalGovtElections2016‬: NATIONAL CHAROUS CONGRESS

For the forthcoming Local Government Elections the National Charous Congress is hereby launched.

Our Emblems and Symbols

  • National Bird – Myna
  • National Flower – Marigold
  • National Food – Bunny chow, potatoe curry and roti
  • National Snack – Samoosas, Gundu Bhajias and Vadas
  • National Sport – Thunee and Gooli Gunda
  • National Anthem – Paadugiren and Ye Ganga maiya
  • National Animal – Live Fowl
  • National Beverage – Glen Tea and Mainstay

Capitals

  • Administrative Capital – Blue Lagoon
  • Legislative Capital – Actonville
  • Judiciary Capital – Rylands

The Shadow Cabinet (Ministers and Deputies)

  • Minister of Education – Mr. Narend Singh ( he can teach us a thing or two)
  • Minister of Agriculture – Mr. Boda Singh
  • Dep. Min of Agriculture – Methi herbs aunty
  • Chamber of Commerce – Mr Balance Singh
  • Trade and Industry – Mandrax Muniamma
  • Correctional Services – Shabir Shaik (we need someone with experience, a case of “been there, done that, got the T-shirt/ overall )
  • Minister of Housing – Bob(by) the Builder – from unit 5 Chatsworth
  • Minister of Finance – Dwarika from Unit 2 Chatsworth who earns R2500 pm and runs a household with 6 children and is content.
  • Minister of Transport – Railway Barracks Krishna
  • Minister of Communications –  Mrs Uursutti
  • Minister of Post -Postman Pat (Patmanathan)
  • Minister of Internal Affairs – Naufal Khan – as editor of Indian Spice he should know all the internal happenings with Charous.
  • Minister of National Intelligence – My neighbour’s wife…she knows whats cooking in everybodys house….literally
  • Minister of Economic Development – Vivian Reddy (he started off barefoot with 1 penny and a 2nd hand small truck…(so does he says)
  • Minister of Tourism – Dinesh Naidoo
  • Minister of Labour – Bag Aunty/Midwife Saras

  • Minister of Police – Captain Prabhakaran
  • Minister of Health Services – Castor Oil Aaji
  • Deputy Minister of Health -Manja Mariathe
  • Minister of Sports and Recreation -Hashim Amla
  • Minister of Fisheries – Shad Soobrie
  • Deputy Minister of Fisheries – Ranies
  • Minister of Water Affairs – Ganga Plumbers
  • Minister of Justice – Mr Karma
  • Deputy Minister of Justice – Mr Dharma
  • Minister of Foreign Affairs – Kumi Naidoo
  • Minister of Arts and Culture – Ms Mala Latchmanan
  • Minister of Minerals -Owner of Crerars Cooldrink, PMB
  • Minister of Public Service – Logie Naidoo ( he must appoint all Charous from Durban)
  • Minister of Safety and Security – Kill Roy
  • Minister of Imbrigation and Border Control – Meneer Freaky Botha (must have one vet ou for this post)
  • Governor of Reserve Bank – Lotri aunty

And last but not least, the President.
Appointment still to be made because all party members are still fighting amongst themselves. Cabinet Ministers and Portfolios will be increased as more infighting takes place.  In true South African style every effort was made to appoint as many family members and konnections as possible.

Public Holidays

  • Pongal
  • Kavady
  • Tamil New year
  • Hindi New year
  • Telegu New Year
  • Pithar Pakh
  • Raam Naumi
  • Hanuman Jayanthi
  • Krishna Jayanthi
  • Luxmi poojay
  • Sarasvathi Poojay
  • Deepavali
  • Eid
  • Easter
  • Christmas
  • New Year
  • Indian Arrival Day – 16 Nov

Official Languages

All 11 languages have been replaced by Tamil, Telugu, Malayalam, Kannada, Hindi, Gujarati, Urdu, Bengali, Punjabi, Marathi and Hinglish.

Issued by Party Secretary – Jimmy Moodley

For the real coverage of this local government elections make sure you are tuned in to The Daily Vox who give you the real story uncensored.

Source: Facebook


About Indianspice Staff Reporter

Report and write stories for Indianspice.co.za. It is our ambitious goal to cover issues/events/news concerning South Africa and the diaspora.

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