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The Halal guide to having mind-blowing sex for Muslim women

#SEX: The Muslimah Sex Manual: A Halal Guide to Mind Blowing Sex packs comprehensiveness in 65 pages. The book is designed for Muslim women seeking satisfying love lives.

The book starts with the basics—lessons on kissing, sending dirty texts, and the importance of foreplay. After that come chapters on sex positions, shower sex, bondage, and masochism.

“This is the best way to vary your sex life,” said the author, who writes under the pen name Umm Muladhat.

The Muslimah Sex Manual, independently published in mid-July 2017, has been variously described as groundbreaking and a welcome step.

How often have you heard the word sex and Islam together?

Not very often, we suppose. There are tremendous misconceptions about Islam and sex. People often believe that majority of ‘normal’sexual activities are taboo in Islam.

However, a deeper study of the texts reveals that the religion is not antithetical to any basic human instinct, including sex. Now taking a lead into talking about sex for practising Muslim women and making them aware of what is permissible to them, a Muslim woman has written a guide for Muslim women on how to have a great sex life. The decision for this book came following an inquiry by a newlywed Muslim woman on how to fix her sex life.

Umm Muladhat’s book, “The Muslimah Sex Manual: A Halal Guide to Mind Blowing Sex”, is probably the first book of its kind. Fearing backlash, the author has decided to remain anonymous and wrote under an alias. Given the subject, she has received plenty of attention from around the world. You know what they say, “there’s no such thing as bad press”.

Speaking to the Guardian, Umm said she felt “compelled to write the book after she discovered women were entering into a lifelong commitment with little knowledge about sex other than snippets gleaned from the back of guides to marriage, with an emphasis on what was forbidden, rather than what was allowed, and with little from the perspective of women.”

An unfortunate incident with her friend is what ultimately led her to the pages of her book. She wrote on her website,

“She knew the mechanics. Insert penis into vagina. Climax. Withdraw. But she didn’t know how to make her husband yearn for her in bed. She didn’t know what he liked. She didn’t even know what she liked! They had begun eagerly but after a few weeks, realized that neither of them was truly enjoying having sex with each other.”

Her friend urged her to write a book after Umm gave her tips on sex here and there.There has been criticism, where she has been accused of promoting lasciviousness. But Umm has reiterated her stance on having “sex only with spouse”.

The manual details myriad ways to engage a partner, and lists around 100 positions—cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, final furlong, Amazon, among them. “Some couples never move beyond missionary position. If that’s what you two enjoy, that’s perfectly fine! However, not every couple wants to stay vanilla every time.”

According to Muladhat, halal sex has some key rules: avoid anal sex, penetrative sex during menstruation, and sex outside of marriage. Pornography too is forbidden—“porn is a lie,” she writes, “porn is one of the worst ways to learn about sex.”

She told the Observer, “I put an emphasis on having sex only with your spouse, but having the full range of sexual experiences with that spouse. Islamically, there’s an emphasis on enjoying physical relationships within the context of marriage, not just for procreation. It is the wife’s right that her husband satisfy her sexually.”

Read a free preview here

Muladhat and her husband too have experimented in the bedroom. “Alhamdulillah, my husband and I have always had good communication,” she said. Their go-to source for new ideas is Christian sex and intimacy books because, unlike mainstream guides, these do not include explicit images.

Since the publication of The Muslimah Sex Manual, Muladhat has received a few angry comments. Critics, the few there are, say the book fetishises Muslim women and encourages promiscuity. Muladhat expected this, which is why she chose to publish under a nom de plume. “I didn’t want to become forever associated with the book such that if any future employer would Google my name, they would find this book. My husband is aware I’ve authored the book and has helped me revise it. My friends are not aware, and I intend to keep it this way.”

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