The only power you have in your relationships is actually accepting that nothing is guaranteed, that in your admittance of errors, the best resolve is not to be defensive.

We need to stop putting our hand over our mouth and acknowledge there are not so nice parts to our existence. This culture of shame needs to be removed so that women can come forward and feel safe to share their stories.

Even if you are not a writer, just pick a time and a quiet space before the New Year starts and reflect. It’s brilliant eye opener when you look back over the distance you’ve come.

I asked Naufal during the course of the day, “Do you need another piece from me?” “I won’t say No!” he responded. The truth is, I did not know what to write about …. Ever had one of those times, when you do something in advance and lagged on something current. I submitted my year-end article before my current submission. I’ve been sitting in front of the computer screen for almost an hour; with word document open, a packet of lightly salted chips, the scent of palo-santo’ed essence still lingering from earlier whilst the Kardashian’s keep me company in the background. I’ve written about four different sentences, only to delete every single one. The need to write is within, but what to write weighed on my mind. Then my AHA! Moment happened. A call from a friend. She was having …

Saffiya Ismail a proudly South African girl from Pietermaritzburg unpacks her identity in this brilliant piece. A must read!